One major contributor to this blog, former Miss Abigail Nwachukwu, changed her family name over the weekend.
Yes, Abigail got married!!!
Now, I’m not here to share details of the apparently successful event, which happened on the 13th of December, 2014 (yesterday). No. But there is something I can’t hide from you: its lessons.
You can add these to the already heavy store of information, on how to make it (marriage) work, that you’ve gotten. Here they come. . .
1. TELL GOD.
Pathetically, there are more people who know this point than there are who use it. They pray over almost everything in their lives. Food. Water. Exams. Admissions. Jobs. Promotions. Contracts. Even matches of their favourite teams and characters in a movie . But when it comes to settling down, they put on their Mr ‘Fix it’ hats. Truth is that very few young fellows ever pray concerning their unknown spouse and the marriage.
I remember a night we had with Abby. She told us how young she was when she started praying for her husband. She very well had not met him before this time. Two things I noticed, or learnt, from her explaination about the decision to involve God was really worth knowing, or learning:
You must trust Him enough to show up with your answers on time. You must also understand that “on time” in His eyes means “perfect” for you, and makes it very different from “on time” in your own eyes (Ps. 90:4; 2 Peter 3:8).
The ways of God are very different from the ways of men. You must seek to please God when searching for a life partner. Most ladies have lost their worth, sleeping around just to hook up with someone that will take them down the aisle. Note this: your marriage is in trouble if you enter his bed before entering his home. Every step along the way should be taken in God. And if God makes the choices, then dating ain’t an option. Because God is NEVER confused! He doesn’t test something to know it. If He says it, you can count on it.
2. DON’T WAIT FOR GOD!
Yes. Wait on Him. Get prepared. Work on yourself. Marriage will come, so, pursue your dreams while waiting.
Abby was a writer and blogger before she got married. She was already hosting forums for singles here and there before she walked to the altar with Ben. Her ‘work’ had already gained online presence before she wedded. Read what she thinks about pursuing a dream, maybe you’ll understand me better.
Don’t you think now will be a good time to further your education, break some bad habits and make new good ones, pursue purpose…instead of lusting after different boys/girls all in the name of looking for love?
3. DON’T JUST WED; MARRY!
So sorry to say this truth: this is mostly ‘girls problem’. They are so obsessed about having great wedding ceremonies that they forget about having great marriages! They go about shopping for this and that, spending money (which, apparently, they didn’t join to make) extravangantly.
Abby’s traditional marriage ceremony happened! Her white wedding ceremony was a reality. It didn’t have to be a luxury. The smiles on her face, the joy in her husband’s heart and the care demonstrated by well-wishers, were all present…regardless of the fact that President Barack Obama didn’t show up! Neither of both marriage events were held in Dubai, or aboard an aircraft. Yet, they attracted true well-wishers indeed.
I personally noticed her calm in all of this.
No struggle to choke her husband to death over an Italian wedding dress. No hummer limousine ride to the venue. And I’m sure that this wonderful day in her life will not be on Linda Ikeji’s Blog. But it is in our hearts, and registered in heaven.
These are the little but long lasting lessons I gained from Abby’s union. I pray that God favours her marriage and blesses them both.
…and HAPPY SUNDAY!!!
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